Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Stacey Dash Is An Immortal

It is one of those facts - Stacey Dash is 43!?? - that gives one pause and makes one doubt and question the natural laws of physics.
Namely, gravity.
And maybe The Highlander (remember that show/movie?) was actually based on the truth. Except The Highlander is Stacey Dash. I wonder how many skulls she has in her closet, eh?
And she's the mother of two! How is it possible? I saw her in last week's episode of The Game and I was like. Alright. Enough. Wikipedia here I come! I went with unshakeable suspicion that she'd looked the same for about 20 years... and it turned out that I was right! Born 1966, baby. 1966!
There are many who look good damn good being in their forties, Halle Berry and Julia Roberts to name a couple. But there's a difference between looking good for 40+ and being an immortal. Stacey Dash looks EXACTLY the same, while Halle et al have acquired a certain subtle vintage. Its not only in the face, but in the carriage. It is very hard to hide the sum of years, and keep it out of ones poise and general demeanour. But I checked out The Game on Friday night, and not only did Ms Dash still look like she just walked off the set of Clueless, she still has the high, breathy voice of a young girl pre-college. Her demeanour girlish and sprightly. That's the give-away. Stacey Dash Is An Immortal!
I may make it my lifes work - who wants to be a novelist anyway? - to carefully examine old pictures until I uncover the true length of Ms Dash's stay on the planet. Perhaps even 1966 is a sham. Perhaps she was born 300 years ago and has stalked the earth cutting off the heads off rival immortal actresses before finally landing a role TV role in the 1980's. Perhaps. It's possible.
But, research or not, I have come away with the desire to also join the ranks of the immortal. I am significantly younger than Stacey Dash. In fact, she's been the same since I was a child! And now that I am many years deep into womanhood, I'm making a commitment to join the ranks of the ageless! I'm starting now!
Green tea? Yoga? Fencing lessons, anyone?
The future is bright! :-)



...R.H... said...


I would also like to know her secret.

Anonymous said...

there can be only one